Ive been home and puttering around with my animals and the winter babies which are always a surprise and always my favorites. Why do lovebirds and finches have babies in the winter? I dunno but they make great Christmas gifts!
Eggs are everywhere here, and Im in awe of the structure of the thing and how it works...Whole Foods is offering some local ostrich eggs for $39 each. They apparentlyhave more yolk than white and scrambled serve 20 people! I am tempted, but I have the shell of one already and I dont know what to do with the luminecent green and dark, dark Maran browns, and pinks that I have...I get the occasional huge mishapen egg with 2 yolks and also a few tiny ones per week from my tiny hen. Ive been giving them away and eating some...my mom feels sorta funny about eating them, because she knows the chickens, but my grandfather, who sill is convalescing in manhattan, loves them.
Thanks to Jill, who knows me too well, for sending me the above from I can Has Cheezburger. My hen, Yellow, is a lutino like the above and I'm hoping that the eggs that she is sitting on now contain at least one like her! In any case, Ive been oddly quiet these past couple of weeks due to loose ends that have been festering around here, oral surgery and the like, and also my lack of inspiration...no, not really that I guess, because my brain is telling me things...maybe its the follow through. Ive been asking myself if I can go on writing about what is happening right now, because I'm, on one hand feeling so relieved that the grownups are in charge that I could cry, but on the other, I feel so wrung out and burned and angry at the Bush people, and the rich folks in America who are so hell bent on saving a couple thousand dollars that they would throw their entire society under the bus.
Ive spent so much time in the past eight years in awe of how horrible and idiotic half of All Americans are, and how really scary the neocon party is that I don't know if I have anything else to say until the pundits stop commenting on how gracious George Bush and his family are being. well, they live in our house, and they must see that the American people WANT this...they must see that they had better fucking be nice and welcoming because the Obamas have the wind at their back and you either get on board or get out of the way.
Of course, things are fucked up. I cant imagine how all of this is going to get done...and with only a few weeks left, Bush is running around the world telling everyone that Iraq is going really well. Im traumatized at what this guy and his people did to our country, and how helpless it made me feel. I guess what I hated the most about it all was how it brought out the mean and greedy side of people. If our leaders are not reminding us that we have to care for eachother as one nation, then we slip into this every-man-for-hisself mentality. Maybe that is something that is just a hard cold truth about human nature, but its supposedly one of the urges that we fight against in order to for a more perfect union. Spoiled Americans...thats what its about...and everytime I think of a story or a commentary, I just go...later...later...later...go out with the chickens now...sit with your dogs now....try to pay the bills!
So, here in chilly CT, trying to thaw out the frozen hose and counting the most beautiful eggs from my chickens, Im going to probate court tomorrow morning because my nasty neighbor complained abut my roosters months ago...very nasty... I had too many from the spring batch and hadnt moved them along quick enough because my grandfather got sick...oh well...boo hoo...and this guy never once spoke to me; just called the city. He sold his house and is leaving, thank god! Its a case which Im winning anyway, and its all very mundane. I'm happy here, though it seems that Im always caught in complex issues and fighting against all the stuff that I tend to amass around me. I will probably die alone with 6 or 7 dogs surrounding me and all of this really cool stuff.
Criminal: Dont hate me because I crow a few times during the day (and never before 9AM)
Fighter of hawks, protector of his girls...known to strut down the middle of the street stopping traffic and refusing to move! Its Woostie! He is actually a big baby and I hug and kiss him as much as I can catch him...He puts up with me.
That all said, my baby lovebirds need homes. They are for sale for a reasonable price... and lovingly hand fed and socialized. Each one has only to bond to a forever human and all will be well...they need a cage, some good seed, dishes, toys and perches. Most of all they need companionship and they like to get out of the cage and hand aroudn with you.
Here are the babies. They are approx. 5 weeks old and 2 are a light moss green, 1 is olive. They are weaned and eating seed and snacks...and cuddling, fluttering, getting into trouble. Lovebirds are the some of the funniest parrots in that they get into everything and shred the paper ...hell, all paper...but mine like to read the paper with me! They go from little devils that are hilarious to sweet cuddly balls of fluff. 2 lovebirds in a cage will bond to eachother and become cage birds. I lovebird that hold alot will bond to you and ride around on your shoulder helping you do everything! Please contact me if you ar ein the tristate area and are interested in one. I am more interested in good homes where they can live fantastic lives than making seed money... If I cant place them, Ill keep them....its not like I have too much going on...right?... Look here for some great stories about the most fantastic small flock of lovebirds. This guy captures so well what they are like and how much one can love a small animal...how they capture your heart and change your life...
The Chickens Come Home to Woost...Chicken Blogging in the age of Derangement (as Taibbi Might Say if faced with the Same...)
Its days like this, sunny and cool, Mother's Day, half-way watching the morning shows and half-way hearing that Obama is actually, really, realistically the democratic nominee, for whatever that's worth, that I gotta just take Frank Rich's advice:
While we wait out her [Hillary's] self-immolating exit, it’s a good time to pause the 24/7 roller coaster for a second and get our bearings.
To some that may mean reconsidering what year this all is comparable to; has there ever been a year like this? I mean, come on, hasn't this been the most unbelievable 7+ years in modern American history just due to the boldness of whats gone on if nothing else, capped by this year of...of...well, what would you compare it to? Sometimes I wonder about Rich,( I always wonder about Dowd, ) there is something a little wrong there, and his choices do it for me less and less these days.
Due to a real lack of free time, while spending a down and dirty year, quite by accident doing some hands-on helping of inner city kids and dealing with the system that is in place for the other America, Ive found myself with less and less time for bullshit. So, out of some sort of underdeveloped survival instinct, Ive been seeing what life is like to just not even waste time on silly busy work, like comparing this year to that year or trying to unravel the morning idiots. Blogtopia (Skippy!!) is no doubt full of people who can and will do that with one hand while doing real in-depth reporting with the other, so, I figure that I should aim my few still-beating brain cells at something or other that doesn't fill me with the equivalent of cheetos; air and oil and cheese powder. So, today, on this day-o-Moms, (and the sad last day of Sammy Seder's Sunday Show, 4PM EST,) its Mom's choice day.
Hearing Marc Maron this past week on Air America Radio also reminded me of the clarity that comes from focusing on the 3 or 4 things that are really happening, and using the rest of my confusing, mixed-up life for the sort of busy work that, for me, is somehow reassuring and calming. Marc seems to be soothed by focusing on his own neurotic self, but for me, if I can just try to get out of that a little.... I live in a sort of bohemian dream with chickens walking through scenes of dappled sunlight, and every day unfolding into some sort of mini chaos that allows for all sorts of doable problem solving, (if I don't kill myself along the way.) There is something about just doing the chores and keeping things running, that makes for sanity of some sort.
So, today I am doing a little chicken blogging, politics be damned. Ive got Mom here puttering round and trying to figure out what different animals mean by the tone of their cluck or growl, (I said bohemian, right?) and my sister , with hopes of a fancy restaurant up-by-her of course, while my slacker teen sleeps and the other one is lauding his "Mom" downtown, waiting to come back to the ranch.
I'm reading Tiabbi's new book, The Great Derangement, and Cliff Schecter's still fresh book, The Real McCain (see my Amazon widget on the right for that and more suggestions,) and trying to focus and project on whats ahead, while staying mindful of the ever changing textures here, where the leaves are out so quickly and if you didn't have rader of some sort, you could forget where you are in the mental GPS of things.
Spring at the ranch brings the inevitability of the arrival of a box o' chicks from the mailman and My Pet Chicken. This one contained 16 fluffballs of different breeds, from the Polish with the big puffy head feathers, to the Turkens with the naked necks (see pics of my actual Turkens below.) This year I got my mom some "real" chickens like she had in Illinois as a farmgal, (only till she was 12, as evidenced by the way she overheated and killed 10 chicks while I was at Yearly Kos last year,) in the form of 2 full sized white leghorns; they were out of Jersey Giants at MPC....oh well...there are always more chickens to be had, and here Ive got Favreolles, and d'Uccles, and all sorts of crazy brands, including the Americuanas which lay light blue and light green eggs.
************************clutch o' babies************************ ***********************Turken********************************************Polish*********************
*************************unknown baby; very cute and tiny**************** *************************Polish posing**************************
My new discovery this year, (last year it was ordering hatching eggs on eBay...hence the multitude of roosters; because you don't get just hens when you hatch eggs!)is EggBid, and the insane practice of shipping live adult birds in bird boxes. So, I won a trio of Frizzle Turkens, who are my absolute favorite creatures.
Now, some may call them ugly, and some may call them strange...but, this is the kind of thing that is right up my alley along with pin feathered baby parrots and hairless rats (or, as we call them around here, Chihuahuas.) I also got a real barred bantam Aracuana hen for my Coonie roo...oh this is starting to sound silly....but suffice to say that Ive been receiving birds in boxes.
Also joining us this spring is Blackie the hamster...don't ask me why I was compelled to buy another rodent when I had sworn them off, but Ben loves him and he is the cutest creature in the world. Ben named him Blackie the Token. I think Ben can do that, just like he can use the N-word (though hes not allowed to at my house at least...and its not his style anyway.)
And then there's Spike, who weighs just 2 lbs at 7.5 months old, and who was very, very sick, wasting away for months in a puppy store...and who is now much better, thank-you-very-much, and loves to jump on my keyboard and bully the big dogs, but who has managed to give one of my other dogs Giardia and worms and whatever else puppy mills spread around these days. I had a half assed plan that after my older dogs start to go, I might just consider a retired racing Greyhound, but somehow I came across the exact opposite, and the rest is history. So cute and self possessed is Spike, that he draws attention to himself so that its hard to get through a store without people stopping in awe. His size is a bit daunting, but hey, maybe he'll grow a little before hes 1...
This is my William on the right with his cousin Zach on the left....both are 14 and disgruntled, both over 5'10" and still growing like weeds.....Ben? Where is Ben?...oh OK... He is very shy lately, as they all are, so this is a little old, and it was actually taken upside down...I need some new pics where everyone doesn't look like they are being tortured.
I also have been keeping Poison Dart Frogs, which is something that has been in the planning for years (along with the reef tank, but that will have to wait.) The invention of a particular terrarium that has layers of different substances that, with a little misting, creates a self sustaining system that needs little to no cleaning, has made this easy; the invention of flightless fruit flies even moreso.
I used to keep Whites Tree frogs before we were struck with a quite strange and rare parasite in the form of a long worm that emerged from my frog's leg one day and that needed to be sent to some university for study, causing the frogs to have to be put to sleep, and I have done more reading about them than actually moving towards getting them. That is until Todd and I went to the reptile show to get some Jacksons Chameleons for the bird store. I became sort of fixated on the Black Jungle booth...and, well, you know.... And, now I want a Jackson Chameleon again after hanging out with the 3 that Todd bought. My old one Jaques, was a grand old man by the time he passed away a few years ago...I really enjoyed him.
Anyway, I'm sure that's not all, but I guess that puppy worms aside, I really enjoy the animals most in life.
Last night, in a sort of idyllic splendor, I grilled salmon while Will tossed a Frisbee with his friend. I was filling the chicken waterer with my Jardines parrot, Kitty, who has her flight feathers cut, or so I thought....well, a shocking sound sent Kitty flying in full arc around the house and up into a tree, just out of reach of me dangling off another tree with a rake in my hand....and then off she went again to an old hemlock by the road, on a level with the power lines...which was where I found myself teetering on the top of a very, very old extension ladder with my Mom and complaining son, (apparently a stick fell in his eye,) holding the the thing, reaching up towards her, just grabbing a tail feather or finger, to have her turn and squawk and try to bite me with that big beak...and finally yelling "Kitty, step up!" she did, and I grabbed her hard and shakily descended the ladder. It was up there on a level with the power lines, realizing that a fall from there could really, really hurt me...like, ambulance and hospital and casts, that I realized that I'm getting a little old for this stuff. But then, I also felt like I had solved a problem, (the bigger problem was solved in trimming her wing feathers this morning,) and that I have some control over my overabundant, crazy, confused life.
I suppose I don't have to go risking my life to feel that, but often I'm compelled by the moment, and ...whats a mother to do?....My Mom was standing below me shouting what seemed like inane directions to me, and she said "just let her bite you," which, if you saw her beak in person or have ever been bit by a parrot might sound sort of crazy, but I was actually thinking the same thing. And that's why we're moms, I guess...at some point you just put your hand in the poo or get bitten or hold a toddler while it projectile vomits across the room, and then methodically clean it up while weeping...today I'm covered with scratches and bruises, and so is my mom, though to a lesser extent...we did have some moments where the ladder swayed out of our control and we were trying to get ahold of it in a keystone cops manner, at one point with it falling actually on us, giving us matching shoulder bruises, with mine being worse and hers showing up more...but we lived to go and sit around the cluttered table and watch the large screen TV which only elicits talk of how things look rather than paying attention to the show thats on.
Happy mothers day to all you Moms out there, to all you dads who are also doing the mom job, and to all you folks who have the mother gene and express it on other's children and also on pets...this day is more about having a certain kind of empathy than a DNA match between one child and one woman....and a big part of that is about how most women are, (and some men too,) in taking care of business no matter what. That Mom thing runs deep, and its something to look towards in regards to regaining what America was before Bush drove this country into the ground.
And finally: Woostie still needs a home, I guess) He has been so bad lately as far as standing in the street stopping traffic and crowing at odd hours. Some of that has been solved with me caging him and covering him with a blanket at night, but he is still a handful here...and a great, loving guy, who is a good watch-bird... He just needs a whole flock of hens all his own!....
Having a Great Time, Wish You Were Here.....Big Brother, Janeane Garafolo, Fundamentalist Christians, and 24 Hours of Sheer Torture; But, I Digress...
Here I am...vacationland, USA, and any notable news that Ive been able to pick up here is pretty blunted in that I haven't had the time to look at the TV news with the sort of depth that usually allows me to digest it and spit it out as an integral part of my own life story...is that narcissistic? So, heaven forbidding that I ever skip the daily grind of life with me, below what I could glean of the newz from the supermarket rack and the Boston paper, is my vacationland posting of current musings on the other side of summer...for anyone who reads that far...and here, for the rest of you, are the newsy things that have struck me in the past few days. Forget hurricanes and politics, lets talk TV!
Apparently, after a terrible last season, the suits at 24 have wised up and made a cast addition that makes sense on so many levels. Yes, the rumors are true, Janeane Garafolo has been tapped to be an agent investigating Jack Bauer's latest escapade. More interesting than the casting is that there is some talk about the ever reworking storyline and how the interaction between Janeane and, executive producer, Joel Surnow, will likely add a breash of fresh air to what has become the stagnant old Bushco torture-the-terrorists plotlines of late. Hopefully, Janeane's intelligence and liberal sensibility will be apparent, even subtly, in the writing, but I'd hope also to see some onscreen debate about the very real issues that are gripping the country right now.
The country has started to turn towards the realization that the big lie that this war is built on is not just hard luck on strangers far away or fodder for a People Magazine cover story, but is hitting home, if it hadn't already, in direct full fledged hardships on all of us. The one reliable thing about most Americans these days is that they definitely will look out for number one, so you can be sure that as this thing starts to touch more and more people directly, the numbers abandoning ship from the promise of lotto winnings and big shiny prizes of tax cuts, will grow. Maybe its petty to not look up from your National Enquirer until gas goes above $3 a gallon, but hey, whatever works. Money talks, and in America, its a very fine line between selling your rights for the empty promises of the possibility that one day YOU TOO could own this timeshare-win the lotto-be a millionaire through the power of 10, and not being able to afford that gallon of milk or a doctor's appointment. Its time for the producers of shows like 24 to follow suit in focusing more attention on the part of Jack Bauer that wrestles with what he has done in the name of his country...what people like him are doing in real life every day in OUR names. It's a worthwhile discussion to have with an audience , considering the resounding reconsideration of who we'd like to have a beer with, as opposed to who we want to plan our wars. The big issue for me also is the huge number of vets who are returning from a war based on a lie, and who will likely, in a reversal of the bold propaganda out there about the liberals, (really the majority of the country at this point,) being anti war and anti soldier, find a welcoming public and a less than welcoming government and a system that is not prepared for the numbers of them, nor the types of problems that they will have, from brain injury to PTSD. This government is not set up for the people, and unless there is a subsidiary of Halliburton that is outsourcing veteran's administration duties, we can be sure that there will be little governmental interest in what society will do with the people who have served our country so bravely. Planning is not a big strength with this crew. At the same time, we will hopefully be seeing a resurgence of patriotic feeling for that fabled New Deal of yesterday, and a renewed interest in how we take care of our own, and who we want to be as Americans. Hell, at that point its only a hop, skip, and a jump to ethics, philosophy, decision-making, and all that other trivia that we used to try to teach our youngsters.
So, any cultural icon like Bauer who might want to last in the coming climate, will want to take a look at whats happening out there in America. And who better to usher in this new era than our pal Janeane? Controversial? yes! Intelligent and neurotic? Yes! Missed horribly by her former listeners? Yes! In bullshit news, via E! Online, is the silly tidbit thrown in that Janeane left AAR because of a "rift" with Sam Seder, which may or may not have played a part in things, in that they squabble like brother and sister...but it seems to me that she is doing plenty in her career, and from what I could tell at the time, AAR wasn't the happiest place to work, and she herself said that what was going on in the country was pretty devastating for her. In any case she had stopped taking a salary long before she left, and was already coming and going on the West Wing There are so many reasons that I oculd cite, with Danny Goldman's management being my favorite guess...but the one I would focus the least on is some huge rift with a guy who she regularly guests with. Sheesh! It is just downright belittling to thrown that crap at the end of an article as if to say that sure people hire her and shes great, but look at how petty we heard she was back then....who and what does that serve? Another fantastic thing...and I don't say this lightly in public...is that this season of Big Brother is the best that Ive seen maybe ever! The wild card estranged father and daughter have turned into quite a story, and the fact that the guy is a wild, tattooed, bar manager, Dick, who is not only really smart, but also a good guy underneath it all, is compelling for me, and not only because I always cheer for the tattooed lunatic in any game! I guess that what got me is that there is a black girl in the house who is a fundamentalist Christian, (yes I am going to parlay this into something political,) and seeing how she prays and talks to her Jesus, is as eye opening as Jesus Camp (which I watched the other night and highly recommend,) in that the weeping, eye rolling, craziness, and the need to "testify" and then feign rightous indignation when Dick questions her, and finally starts to snipe at her about her Jesus failing her. Just listening to her conversations with god, are enough to illustrate how any cult could get past the predicted dates of armegeddon again and again, and then happily drink the kool-aid when all else fails. "Oh my Jesus, I guess I am not meant to understand your ways...so I will have to just trust you my Jesus, that you have another plan for me, rather than to allow me to win this million dollars and become one of those people who are benefitted by President Bush's tax cuts...oh Jesus, I trust you so, I do, I do..." (cue the tears, clench the fists, shake violently, roll around...cut!...Print!...thats a wrap!)
The ongoing gameplay by Dick, which has allowed him during some of these weeks to really take the religious element down, has been worth the price of admission in itself. Its apparent to me that Dick is a liberal guy and also that he really doesn't care to tear anyone's god down...but why does this crazy girl need to vomit her belief all over everyone? That overly agressive proselytizing is taught at the Jesus Camp....where, before Haggart was shamed out of his pulpit and the camp itself was shut down, children were groomed to be soldiers who are willing to die for Jesus; broken down and built up, along with the obligatory pounding music and terrifying dance numbers. You see, out there somewhere, everywhere, are christian conservatives who are looking to the radical Muslims and saying, (out loud,) that if they can groom an entire generation of western hating child soldiers in Madrasas, that we'd better get on the case. This is an arms race and the nuclear weapons are humans who are willing to die for a cause. It takes alot of brainwashing to accomplish that, and obviously, its being done. There is a reason that the Left Behind series of books is the biggest seller in America...and also why the Left Behind mission went to so much trouble to make a video game aimed at children, where you choose your weapon, ride next to Jesus, and smite all the sinners left behind after the rapture. This is sick! Thanks to the producers of Big Brother for the interesting casting choices which have given us a chance to look into some very different worlds and maybe gain a little knowledge along the way.
And on to the good stuff...not!
Greetings from the the Cape of Cod, where I've been catching a few cool overcast days and trying to not spin too far back to my childhood of hot days in the back seat of the VW bug, lost on back roads, looking for Scargo Lake Potters (where I hope to never again go...and which Mom can't seem to shut up about today,)...and how differently every one of us perceives all thats happened and the lives we've led. And then there is also what we agree on, which usually involves politics and anti organized religion sentiment; social issues, which stand in for the ingrained pain of who was or is an active alcoholic, and how exactly things went back then, driving around in the second hand VW bug in the heat, my sister and I, and Mom in her world of endless beauty and possibility, which definitely has its moments in escapism, but is not where I'm able to go these days. So, here I am in this incredible place, where the bay tide recedes out for what seems like a mile, leaving pools of hermit crabs and little quick darty fish, before it turns on a dime and roars back in by nightfall, making a deep water beach where you could be up to your neck in dark waters unexpectedly quickly, doubting the rip tide and hearing the Jaws music in the core of your primal brain ...such is the slope of the sad; unnoticeable during the day when the flats stretch out forever, then somehow, the curve of the earth becomes apparent in the power of the tide and you could slide right under for how steep it seems. Anyway, of course, this is a week where my William is having a terrible time, and its exhausting for me...couldn't reach the Dr. because my cell phone lost power in the night and then I somehow slept late after a pretty sleepless night; apparently too late. Ben does not love this place the way we do, but maybe you have to do this from the time you're a little kid to ingrain it properly, and also Will has not been easy to be with (to say the least)...and I know that Ben's experience with beaches involved some long ago seeing of his father in Haiti and hating the heat, humidity, and bugs. I realized a long time ago that Ben may just be a city guy, which will be really good for him if he can end up at a college like NYU, Colombia, or Yale. I tend to automatically write those off for Will because the setting is just wrong for the kind of person he is...too much hustle and bustle and noise. But anyway, everyone is sort of born into who the are, and then slowly confirms it by how well they weather their surroundings and what they are able to get used to.
I dont know what draws me to the cool overcast days, except for the summers of my childhood which were spent on the shoulders of the season up here, when the prices drop and the tourists beat a path back to their regular lives; I see them now, tired moms with double jogger strollers and a straggling bunch of kids pushing heavy loads of beach necessities after a long day at the public beach with all the little kids...doing the summer thing with other moms and their kids, pushing that load back to the little houses up the street that are better for younger kids because one has to go much further to get in trouble on the shore. We get a place that is on the actual beach. I cant remember a time when we didnt, even when I was a little kid... I guess you takes your chances....but I feel for those tired moms of multiple toddlers who all might go and drown themselves out of curiosity, and the crushing responsibility that they share in small groups of sunburned women and their sandy kids....walking tired up the road. Its been a long summer that has flown by so fast...and besides the issues of they day, impeachment possibilities, Big Brother, and the great fun of the Yearly Kos, I feel like I've been running ragged, and like I have to simplify if Im going to make it through this year in one piece. So I am resting finally on day 3 of my "vacation"....as I wait for the Dr's call and contemplate the real possibility of having to bring William home tonight or tomorrow if things don't get better. And meantime a chicken hatched...yes, don't ask...I am travelling with chicken eggs in a traveling incubator...what else would anyone expect of me? How else would I, could I plan things?
The great thing is that this location is perfect and the people who own it allowed me to bring my bird, Kitty the Jardine...which I extrapolated to be permission to being Vince, the new Indian Ringneck Parakeet...and then of course, I have the chicken eggs in the incubator which are either all gonna hatch in the next 2 days or...they smell for a reason. Its not a rotten smell, but a barnyard smell...so Im hoping to get at least a few live hatches. If not, I have 5 more chicks coming next week, so Pearl doesnt have to live alone.
I finally downloaded my pictures from Kos onto this laptop, and there at the beginning were pics of some of the chicks that were tragically lost while I was galavanting 'round Chicagoland...and they were really beauties...I must say that even though they were only chickens and all that, I'm so very sorry for the timing that made me have to leave them when I did... But hell, they could have been scrambled eggs or fryers...when you do this egg and chick shopping thing you realize that people are buying 20+ fryer/BBQ packs of chicks to raise for meat. So, my little paradise is worth a shot for any old egg even if it sometimes turns out badly.
Back at the homestead, look what Rosie laid.... What to do, what to do?...
Off to the Yearly Kos...Welcome to Vincent Bird...John Edwards for President... and my Limited Experience With the Other America
Welcome to Vincent!! he is a baby Indian Ring Neck parakeet who has just come to live with us from Parrots & Co.. What can I say? Some things just make sense....and Vincent did.
What makes this guy able to change reports about the health of the American public, andisn't it rather Third Riech-ian to force department after department to mention the success of Bushco a certain number of times in each paragraph...? How can this be??
Here we are poised on the edge of the week that will feature the Yearly Kos, complete with all the major democratic candidates sniping at each other while looking sideways, shifty eyes to try to figure how that looks on them, and repositioning their bustles to march away with their various entourages...however that works....and I am slayed by the huge and disgusting specter of what Bushco has made of this administration and our constitution. Every blog, every television channel, for Christ's sake!!...every person that I meet on the street who sees my impeach button is just in sputtering disbelief. At least there is community in that, and there will be community at the Kos in that we feel that somehow we can do something in that all of our voices together have become very loud no matter how tiny any one of us is (thats me...the tiny one!)
Never have I seen such dripping contempt for the law, the branches of government, and the people, as I have with this crowd. The Nixon Whitehouse was absolutely liberal and socially correct, law-abiding and ...um...sweet, compared to this crowd. I just wanted a little something to sink my teeth into, not the fall of the empire!
I'm living in fast forward and as usual I have too many irons in too many fires, and too many feet in different worlds. I've not been blogging much this week because every time Ive made a draft, it seems that life moves past that place and it all seems quaint. So, yes, as of today I am apparently going to the Kos, and I wish I could say that Ive got all my chickens in a row and parrots standing at attention, but I don't...and this big messy life continues its course towards the nearest iceberg...if those even exist anymore. Maybe that's why the basement keeps flooding.
Jill did a fantastic job of encapsulating the democratic debate, as she has also been doing a great week-in-review thing at The Crone Speaks blog, and will have it up later on as an alternative to the reruns on 60 Minutes. The thing that struck me was that Edwards is getting fed up; I like him when he is fed up. When he says things like "aren't you just SICK of this?" it really touches me....I was sick of this from the get-go, and I want Bush out of office...people are dying, people are suffering, and our country is falling apart. But more to the point is that I have been trying to navigate some very difficult necessities with Ben's family, and it has given me full exposure to just a tiny part of what the day to day is like for people in the other America. For those of you who don't know Ben, he is my son Will's best friend,and has been a wonderful addition to just about every day of our lives in one way or another for the past 5 years. Lately its every day because, thanks to welfare reform, Ben's mom has completed a course in being a home care companion and now has intermittent work that she has to take in order to secure her benefits, which takes her away from Ben (her 6th kid, and the only one still at home...the rest are grown up,) and the 2 grandkids that she is raising. I'm talking about a job that begins early Monday morning and goes till Saturday morning, 24 hours per day. Who cares for the kids? Well, if Bill Clinton and the idiots who pushed this idiotic reform through ever asked that, maybe we would have less of a problem with kids in the inner city caught up in drugs, gangs, pregnancy, or just slipping through the cracks and unable to get their work done. An older gentleman, who is just wonderful, watches the children during the week at this point and one of Ben's older sisters has been around with her 3 kids, but he is old and she is screwed up, and her kids are problematic, and the house is too small. I take Ben because I want him and also because I don't want him to be there, doing nothing, and unable to read because its too noisy. Some of the kids go to the city camp, and some hang around. In general the grownups seem to be careful about not letting anyone go to the playground alone...but, how long can that go on? One girl is a beautiful, tall 13 year old, and one kid is a troublemaker...one of the cousins is a tiny girl who has been known to kill small animals, and the last time I saw the responsible older sister/mom person, she was sitting next to an open bottle of rum with a pack of Newports on the couch next to her, braiding a kid's hair painfully, and slurring about how she has lost her housing and is moving to Florida in a couple of weeks.
This is welfare reform up close. Mom is working, the programs are limited and there are few supplies because the high school kids come into the community center once a week and steal everything. The public school puts out its supply list in a week or so, and each list contains items that cost roughly $100 per kid if you get the cheapest items at Staples. Mom is not around, and the local Supermarket moved from 1 block from the "complex," to 2 miles away, across the street from another huge supermarket! So, Shoprite opened a humongous market on rt. 1, which was needed, and then Stop and Shop proceeded to close their store and move directly across the street. Where is the city planning committee when these things are decided? The "Village" which was built on the rubble of the high rise projects that used to be a fortress against the cops are cute little streets, like culde sacs, carved into the inner city, with white houses and some low-rise apartments and condos for sale, but are only notable in that they look good in a driveby or a flyover, but are so shabbily constructed as to be made literally of plastic. The door jambs are flexible plastic that have taken on the dirt of a million little dirty hands and when you go to press the doorbell the entire piece bends in and then pops out. The carpeting inside is white; enough said....the blinds are the cheapest mini-blinds and have long ago buckled under their own weight, much less being opened and closed. These small houses are "rented" to low income families who are giving a portion of their benefit check for rent, and so there is no extra money for upkeep. The city has seemingly done none themselves, except to keep the streets clean. There are no garbage cans on the streets nor are there mail boxes. One has to walk off the compound to go to the post office, much less the store or market. Going to the market used to consist of walking 3 blocks and pushing a cart back, but now it involves walking miles in the heat and pushing a cart back or taking a cab. Of course, one or two towers of the old projects still stand up the street, so these people are the lucky ones. The gardens are well tended and the residents of this place show alot of pride in their homes.
recently, the police came to the house next door to Ben's to find a guy who had an outstanding warrant for ...um...murder. he wouldn't come out and a bunch of guys came outside, a crowd gathered, and the new crop of Stamford police academy grads tasered a bunch of guys and threw some people around. This is the house next door that always has very loud rap music coming from it. The Bloods gang has a problem with certain Haitians and has shot guns in and around this area....and Ben feels like it is all very safe there. There is a strong Christian Haitian community down there, but Ben's family are not church members, so they keep to themselves and with their small group of friends and family.
In the time that this struggle has been going on with Ben's mother's work. I have continued to do what I have always done with them, which is to be their friend and to have Ben here as much as he wants to be with us. I also have, for the first time, helped them with doctors and groceries. A social worker who had hooked Mom up with the schooling and job that takes her away for entire weeks at a time was supposed to help get the Husky health insurance forms in...and let me tell you, these are complicated forms for ME to fill out...so, she found herself too busy and out of money and blood pressure medication. The doctor wouldn't fill it unless she went in and that cost $90, not to mention the medication cost. So, she ran out of meds and became so sick that she couldn't work, get food, get out of bed...and finally she called me and asked if I could front her the money to see the Doctor.
I did, of course, and I also got some food because the cupboard was bare! I then set about filling out the papers to get Ben health insurance from the state, and realized that she is also eligible as a caretaker...not to mention that the two grandchildren that she has custody of are already on it, and she should have been offered it long ago for her and for Ben. The problem is that the forms are crazy complicated and even with a highlighter and little stickies, its nearly impossible to get it all done in reasonable time when someone is gone 100% of the time during the weekdays. This is welfare reform....and I am keeping Ben up here while the others are left down there....I check the food, bring groceries, and hope for the best. I give the caretakers there my phone numbers and they lose them over and over...and finally we have a number of where the mom is working, so we can reach her. She got a cell phone but it is a pay as you go which is expensive, and she is only making $500 flat per week, which comes out to around $4 per hour....Oh, did I mention that this job is only temporary? Previously it was only the weekends, it may change again at the drop of a hat...who knows? Part of poverty and living in that other America is that everything is intermittent and everything costs more. Takeout or delivery food when the market is too far, taxis because you have no car, pay as you go phone at as much as 25 cents per minute because you cant guarantee payment in order to get an account with a cell phone company or don't have a credit card because you were offered many in the past and..... This is how it is.
Our social services that were so handicapped by the Reagan administration in the days of Manhattan with streets covered with the homeless and AIDS patients, have been dealt such a blow by this horrible administration that it is impossible to judge budget feasibility or where we stand in the larger picture of what social security was supposed to be in spirit in this country, and it is unclear to me if we can have any focus group look at things against the current backdrop and make improvements or to assemble a panel of great philosophical minds and try to remember what it is that America is...what we were...why we were formed...and what we want to be.
John Edwards is the guy to bring that conversation back to life. He has kept a consistent message since before this mess began, and even when the handlers got ahold of him, he has stayed on message.
Look, the majority of the country is on board with the anti-war, anti criminal behavior by our elected officials deal, and I'm not saying that we should let up in any way, but the important things to get done past that are diplomatic and having to do with how we will survive as a society if we don't honor the weakest among us. Wasn't the point of the formation of America so that everyone could have a chance at some sort of a life and the opportunity to achieve much more than that. Weren't these ideas formed by people who were fleeing a monarchical system that ensured a permanent upper class that one could only be born to, and a permanent underclass? Our constitution and laws are supposed to protect the rights of all people, and the aim of this government is supposed to be to perfect the original aim of the idea that everyone has the right to fulfill their potential in full while living with rights and dignity. I know that someone out there will bring up slavery and women's rights, but the point to me is that we are charged with the responsibility of working hard to perfect the tendency of humans to do what is the selfish, barbaric, and crazy thing. Isn't religion largely based on that? And isn't our government also based on that as well? Its the striving to overcome our own tendencies and to give everyone a chance...that would have to include putting a check on unfettered ...anything....we do not have the moral strength to do this internally...right?
I want to discuss the wealth factor in the Edwards equation, but I may save it for another post, because I am hoping that the issue evolves into the reality that they are ALL wealthy, and that the image of the slick lawyer who would take you to the cleaners is being exploited by the right here, and pasted on Edwards, with no real evidence that he has done anything to anyone...except to win against some large corporations. And since when does the average person care about large corporations being made to pay royally for mistakes that take people's lives? Especially when awards are decided largely next to a picture of how much a large corporation makes. You would think that Edwards was taking grandma's farm away because she bumped someone's car at a red light! Now, that's good use of propaganda...but it has nothing to do with reality. I hope that Edwards addresses this head on....and keeps up the good work like the great HAIR video:
Rove, Tech Nightmare ver. 2.1, birds & eggs, Paper Folding Conventions, Dirty Water Dogs, and So Long Bobby Barker...You Will Be Missed....
Ive spent days going round with tech visits from Dell and Cablevision, and talking here and there to Verizon Wireless, and I'm happy to report that the cable burned out on the pole, but I also managed to get a new motherboard, networking card, and processor from Dell...oh, and also a new Verizon card reader for the laptop. As I had predicted that the card holder was merely unplugged, but I guess I got the new one anyway just for good measure. The only problem left now is that the laptop keyboard is not working right, which may mean that the tech put it back wrong, or that its shot! Considering that my little rogue lovebird, Daisy, likes to jump on it real quick when she thinks Im busy elsewhere, waddle forward in fast motion like some sorta cartoon, and grab the keys off really quickly, shouldnt be a problem... I do often have to snap them back in place....naw, Im thinking its more likely that the air cleaning and the reinstall did something to it....damn!! I know that the tech stuff is of more interest to some of you than others, so Ill cut it out...except to say that I did fix the mail forwarding on some other site thats been a royal pain in my ass...and I finally embedded a player here, though I am sick in bed so dont have my clips of Jim Earl singing to Maron or Janeane and Sammy fighting in the commercial break... So, Ive got one of my themes up for now and will figure the rest later....
Yeah, I got the evil kid germs from the evil kid...and even knowing the course of this thing doesnt make it any less depressing....plus that Ive been dealing with some business stuff and Will's last week of school, complete with 6 teacher gifts, 2 bus driver gifts, and 1 headmaster gift, which really needed to be nice and special because these people have been a godsend to me! It is absolutely the best school ever (and the most expensive, but then, thats considered a medical expense I guess.) I've made it past the throat and am into the sinus, with the wrackign cough to come....and it fucks up father's day a bit, but thats not something that we play up around here much because Will's father is absent and asleep at the switch when it comes to things like holidays, birthdays...any days.... Ben's dad lives in Haiti and doesnt speak much English. Ben hates heat, humidity, and bugs, so is planning on maybe seeing him at some point really quickly and jumping back on a plane to the safety of a yankee east coast city!
All of the confusion of days of wandering through a Nyquil hangover haze and having to get stuff done has left me feelign like...whats happening out there? And the resounding answer is that things are fucked as usual, but that Rove is looking like he is in big time trouble...We know he broke the law, and I dont know what the big deal is with investigating it. These guys have lied, impeded investigations, and stood in our way long enough; Lets get to it. I dont feel sorry for Libby...I want him in jail for his full term. I'd also like to see Rove and quite a few of his buddies in jail as well. The arrogance and the stupidity...the deaths and the sinking feeling of no end in sight...and the hopelessness of poor people in this country and in my very neighborhood who have no way out and cant feed themselves and get their medications, demands that the neocon agenda be stopped, and that the people who have caused so much misery and put us into this spiral down, pay in some way! There will be a lot more misery to come too. This surge has to be stopped. I cant imagine what it serves to wait till September when we know that it is not working. Isnt this a crime? Shouldnt Bush be examined by Psychiatrists or something?...because this is delusional thinking, and people are dying...and its summer in Baghdad...that means its freakin hot and sandy.... What more has to happen? Isnt it bad enough that the social fallout from this is going to be catastrophic in that we, as a country, are not only unprepared for the PTSD in the soldiers, but unprepared for the mailaise that we are surely already deep into as a county, and which is sure to get worse as we begin the long withdrawal in defeat and all thats left is to look at eachother and ask why...? Jill linked today to this scary-interesting Shakesville piece on how screwed the reasoning is behind the upcoming (and current) war plan (s)...and how misled and mistaken we've been...and below that it goes on to on discuss how psychologically damaging a war with no reason is...I feel very damaged when Ive been lied to...and I also feel very betrayed by anyone who Ive ever known who went along with this nonsense out of laziness or a feeling of helplessness... The despair is a bottomless pit.
I watched Bob Barker yell his last "come on down," last night, during a week when I was so out of it as to be mindlessly watching soap operas from my youth and...yeah...a game show or two. Barker says that Rosie O'donnell should replace him and thats part of why I like him so much. Old Bob speaks his mind and, for all the hairspray and 50's sensibility, is a real passionate activist....Maybe he can go on to find his soapbox now....and though I know that the money is there for her to do just about anything, I think that Rosie has some important political work to do in the next year or two. We're fighting for our lives out here, and with AAR silenced in such a drastic and disgusting way, we need everyone we can get! Look, I've never been a big Rosie fan in general, but when is the liberal elite gonna stop turning up their noses at her and realize that she bravely went onto daytime TV and during a timeslot where youre lucky if anyone even thinks, she told it like it is in no uncertain terms. Dont add me to her craft group just yet, but she has my thanks and congratulations on a job well done...its just too bad that Elizabeth the stupid-head Hasselhoff...er...beck...er...back...is still there spewing her garbage. She was one of the few "celebrities" that the Republicans could wrangle to speak at their NYC convention last time rund....and you know that they were desperate to have hired her! I just think that its wrong to allow anyone to spew lies on TV...and what she is saying is partly just her own stupidity, but mostly the talking points....Where is our voice?...
Speaking of which, Ive been listening to some old Marc Maron Shows from last year and they hold up great...I wonder if that means that we are largely in the same place, or that the material is timeless...its wonderful material and I just MISS hearing him/them every day so badly!...I also miss Al, and Sam...I miss what it used to be: new, experimental, and hopeful...and I am disgusted by this Lionel character...can hardly listen to even the crackly bit of Randi here and there that comes in in the car sometimes. But Im gonna probably just try to listen to the old shows over again and hope for better days. I was in the market yesterday and just laughing and laughing at my ipod input...its been a long time since I got to be that cracking up lady in the market...Im gloomy, doomy lately. Maron is in San Diego this weekend and Providence, Rhode Island next weekend (a place where I really want to go and hang some time, but I'm gonna be all tied up in NYC....sorry Westin Hotel...sorry Heavenly bed...sorry to me, staying in a dorm room and perching at whole foods and starbucks in chelsea...)
So whats happening? Whats in store? This coming Friday Ben and Will and I head down to NYC for the Origami USA convention at FIT in Chelsea. We will be staying at a dorm and I will be wandering and hovering round while they are folding and hanging out with their paper people. Thousands of paper folders converge on the school for this 4 day fold fest, and they fold all night and day...really strange to me....but what they make is fantastic! I will definitley be posting alot of pictures of the exhibit and goings on... Otherwise, Ive been back in touch with some musicians who I knew in another lifetime and touch base with from time to time..., and one of my very favorites, Homeboy Steve, is playing on Friday night in Manhattan with one of his many bands, The Dirty Water Dogs. Its very close to where we are staying. ...I also have tickets to go and meet John Edwards earlier on Friday evening, which will likely be a zoo, but if Im down there and the boys go to the Origami opening reception I might just wander away into the NY evening to see whats out there. Its is also usually the weekend of the Gay Pride Parade, which is incredibly fun, and completely otherworldly when youve been hanging round with origami folders.
It seems like a long haul to be in a dorm, but the boys love it. I find it pretty sparse and lonely, but I usually get alot of work done...and thats what I need to do for sure!!..
In bird news, Rosie laid another egg last night and Im leaving her alone as much as possible. It will be 28 days from today if the thing is to hatch. She is a prolific layer, but Im worried about her physically. Once she is done laying this bunch, Im bringing her to the vet for a check up. She moves around the cage very strangely, and her flying is not good. It may be from the eggs and discomfort or she has had some injury since she came to me. I am not opposed to turning them into pets, but he is a little agressive. I want to see how they do over this and the next breeding season, and then figure it out. Meantime, I am preparing parrotlet land for nestboxes. They are scrappy little dolls, those lil' parrotlets...and they are alot of parrot packed into a tiny little body.
Welcome to Shakesville....its not that I havent been reading you from time to time, its just that Ive been too busy to update the blogroll here...not that it matters much, but I like to give at least a reference to where Im stealing my ideas from...;-)
